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Fabulous Literature by sessisie


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Submitted on
December 17, 2012
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2,580
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44
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you bare your muscles,
threaded in tight knots, bundled  
but beautiful, yours

like those fibrous eyes,
irises in maple coils
unwinding me, as

unkempt synapses.
a glance inside your lovely
skin, bones, nerves, I'd like

to press your pleasure
points, to scrape against your thighs,
my fingers trembling,

the dimples on your
shoulders, enzymes, waiting for
an induced fit, mine,

thumbs brushing your hips,
lips lain softly twixt your veins,
a complex of us,

your latticed, protein-
laden pulchritude, pleated,
folded into sheets,

await just one touch.
:iconprojectdfc: Day 17! There's a lot more to this piece, actually. I may or may not post it later. I don't know. Possibly.

Anywho, I took out part of it as a haiku.

[Jan 19, 2013] EDIT: I added the rest, for those who view it from this point onward.

[Feb 12, 2013] EDIT: Holy crap, guys. A DD. This is an enormous honor. After about 5 years on dA, I was starting to think I'd never get one! XD Many, many, MANY thanks to Maddie (*intricately-ordinary) and ^thorns!
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-02-12
A+P by ~Bluezbreakr ( Suggested by intricately-ordinary and Featured by thorns )
:iconhopeburnsblue:
hopeburnsblue Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I totally thought of the "latticed, protein-laden pulchritude" as the hymen/virginity. No idea if I'm right, but if so, that was brilliant.
Reply
:iconkotaroslover:
KotarosLover Featured By Owner May 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
oh goodness....i love it! :)
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner May 18, 2013
Thank you very much! :D
For the fav as well!
Reply
:iconkotaroslover:
KotarosLover Featured By Owner May 18, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:) you're welcome, hon.
Reply
:icondeathbycellocase:
DeathByCelloCase Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Holy shit. The wording is so lovely!
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013
Thank you :heart:
Reply
:iconeuxiom:
Euxiom Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Nice work, very nice work. :nod:
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:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you very much! ^_^
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:icongraphiteforlunch:
graphiteforlunch Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist
Good heavens, this is beautiful. This does homage to the true complex beauty of the human body more than most anything else I've read. It appreciates the lover's body on a deeper level than simply the skin; I find myself thinking like this sometimes with my own lover. Congrats on a well deserved DD, and I am adding you to my watch list for sure!
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
This is easily one of the best comments I've gotten so far! :tighthug: Thank you sooo much! :D
Reply
:icongraphiteforlunch:
graphiteforlunch Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Hobbyist
Aww! I'm honored that you say that! Well, it truly is beautiful. :hug:
Reply
:icondemongirl1369:
demongirl1369 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
very nice
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:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you! :)
Reply
:icondemongirl1369:
demongirl1369 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
any time :)
Reply
:icongraphixs6:
GraphixS6 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I don't get it. Maybe It's just because I've read John Updike's A&P.
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
XD I didn't even consider that when titling this, to be honest. This "A&P" is "anatomy and physiology", though, due to all of the human body references.

:)
Reply
:iconwolfiegirl12:
wolfiegirl12 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Student General Artist
Normally romantic poetry is a stimulus for me, but this is more relaxing than anything else because of how unique in writing it is. Well done.
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:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you :huggle:
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:iconwolfiegirl12:
wolfiegirl12 Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Student General Artist
:D
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:iconcarolyn7727:
Carolyn7727 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Student Writer
So sensual
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:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Indeed! XD
Reply
:iconshadowedacolyte:
ShadowedAcolyte Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Kinky biochemistry! Love it. I actually wrote a piece with a lot of the same jokes [link] . Congrats on the DD!
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you, and great piece! XD I chuckled a good bit on the second stanza :)
Reply
:iconshadowedacolyte:
ShadowedAcolyte Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2013
I live only to amuse! Thanks.
Reply
:iconastrangeallure:
astrangeallure Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Amazing...makes me want to attempt a haiku...I've been tempted before, but didn't follow through...I think I will now...thanks!!! :heart: And congrats!
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Oh wow, I'm somebody's inspiration! :iconflatteredplz:

Good luck on the haiku! I'd love to read it!
Reply
:iconastrangeallure:
astrangeallure Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Cool...I'll let you know when I post it...it might be awhile. :D
Reply
:iconlimelight-night:
Limelight-Night Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
I literally just came out of anatomy and physiology class
I know this is a sensual poem but I suggest you use the terminology in a more accurate way? Some of them make sense like the 'bundled muscles' and 'protein-laden' but one that jumps out at me is "unkempt synapses". I mean if that were true your lover's body would be neurologically screwed up, which isn't appealing I don't think.
Maybe what you meant were nerve cells as a whole, which then would make sense, since they look disorganized all together. But a synapse is the specific area where neurotransmitters are released.
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:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
It was mostly done for the sake of the word itself, but if I recall correctly, my thoughts upon writing that down were the feelings one can get in a moment like that--jumbled up, making everything seem better than it actually is. Inaccurate, all in all, as if something is wrong with the nerves.

I know that "unkempt synapses" wouldn't literally give that effect (nothing even similar to it XD), but it wasn't meant to be taken too literally.

I might end up revising it later to make more sense anatomically, though.

Thanks for the feedback! :)
Reply
:iconlimelight-night:
Limelight-Night Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013
Well that makes more sense when you explain it, but you're welcome :)
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Okay, I first though of A&P by Updike, I admit it...though I can deduce that's not the subject of the poem...

Anywho, I simply loved all the anatomic terms. It added something very--odd maybe? detached?--about the narrator...
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
In this context "A&P" is "Anatomy and physiology" XD

And thank you!
Reply
:iconinsomniaplague:
insomniaplague Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:meow: Erm, I knew that. You're welcome...:)
Reply
:iconcairngorm77:
Cairngorm77 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
bravo bravo adding you to my watch list give us more
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you very much! :D
Reply
:iconalterego1629:
AlterEgo1629 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This was absolutely fantastic! I love the flow of the piece overall and especially love how each is a little haiku at the same time. :clap: As someone who thoroughly enjoyed 2 semesters of Anatomy & Physiology, I loved the little plays on the usage of vocabulary and concepts from it. This is the best piece of literature that I have read in months.
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:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you very much! :)
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:iconlintu47:
lintu47 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Congrats on the well deserved DD! :dalove:
Have a nice day! :heart:
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
Thank you very much!

:iconohstopitplz:

And you, too!
Reply
:iconlintu47:
lintu47 Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
My pleasure, thank you :happybounce:
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy, I'm not... :iconfriendlymushroomplz:...

well, actually I am, but you did good here!
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2013
XD

Many thanks, friend!
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:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013   Writer
Regardless as to whether or not this conforms to a traditional interpretation of haiku/senryū, it's quite good. I chose to read it as strophes in a free form verse poem, and it really was aesthetically and visually effective.
Reply
:iconbluezbreakr:
Bluezbreakr Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
Wow! I honestly didn't expect anybody to take notice of the update! And thank you very much! :D For the fav as well!
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